STOP (in the Name of Love)

Posted on | May 22, 2020 | Comments Off on STOP (in the Name of Love)

Dear Short Answers:
I live in a small beachside town in Florida and we have been very lucky to have almost no virus cases in this area. About a month ago, my son and his wife and their two children decided to move out of Boston and stay with me here since they can work from home now. It was fine at first but now I am going crazy. They refuse to let me leave the house (I am over 70 years old but very healthy) even though they go grocery shopping and take their children to the beach. Before they arrived I had a great routine of walking with a friend every morning for 2 hours, having coffee with a friend (at a safe distance) and I would even have a glass of wine with a friend on her front porch.  They won’t let me do any of that and claim that it is for my own good. It’s MY house and it’s MY life.  How do I handle this? I can’t kick them out but I can’t live like this. Help!

Dear Suffocated:
Hahahaha. There appears to be a lot of this going around — kids who attempt to restrict their parents activity in the name of love. Wonder where they got that idea?

Grace Under Pressure

Posted on | May 22, 2020 | Comments Off on Grace Under Pressure

Dear Short Answers:
I am “quaranteaming” with a few friends and have been since early March. It was fun at first but I’m not sure that I picked the right group. I’ve brought up the subject that maybe we should split up and find new groups and they were furious calling me a traitor and stuff like that. Since this quarantin may gone on for months or years, are we really stuck with the group we started out with FOREVER??
Over It

Dear Over It:
EVERYONE is over-exposed these days. Our advice: minimize drama and apologize frequently.

If in Doubt, Moderate

Posted on | May 22, 2020 | Comments Off on If in Doubt, Moderate

Dear Short Answers:
Is GUM bad for your teeth?

Dear Love:

Curb Your Enthusiasm

Posted on | May 22, 2020 | Comments Off on Curb Your Enthusiasm

Dear Short Answers:
I am actually enjoying the restrictions that the pandemic has required but no one wants to hear about it. Should I pretend I’m miserable like everyone else?
Loving It

Dear Loving It:
Goody goody for you. You don’t have to pretend, but you could turn down your jubilation.

Recovery RX

Posted on | May 10, 2020 | Comments Off on Recovery RX

Dear Short Answers:
I am a recovering alcoholic and I have to say that online cocktail parties are the best thing that ever happened to me since going sober. I can have fun with my drinking friends while they drink but not have to sit in a bar (which I can’t do) and not be tempted by people physically drinking around me. My friends are all dying to go into a real bar and drink together. How can I convince them to keep this up online?
Seriously Sober

Dear Sober:
Glad the online party works for you. We suspect that it will be quite a while until people feel comfortable congregating in bars. Perhaps others will discover that the comforts of home are more relaxing than the inherent stresses of in person encounters.

Sheltering in Place: The Cost

Posted on | May 10, 2020 | Comments Off on Sheltering in Place: The Cost

Dear Short Answers:
Even before the virus, my BF and I were planning to split up. And now our relationship is even worse. The problem is that now is not a good time to be looking for a new place to live especially since I don’t have a job and can’t really afford much of anything. The lease is in my BFs name and he pays all the rent. It’s a one-bedroom apt and we still sleep together so he still expects sex.  When I complain he just tells me to move out which I can’t do. How do I convince him we should live together without having sex until I can afford to get the hell out.
Suffering in Place

Dear Suffering:
We agree with him. If you don’t like his rules, get out.
Hint: Get a job.


Posted on | May 10, 2020 | Comments Off on WHAT?

Dear Short Answers:
I have several friends who are hard of hearing. They have hearing aids but, of course, those things don’t always work.  Consequently, they have a tendency to get very close to you so that they can hear what you are saying. Right now, that behavior makes me very nervous.  Even when I speak loudly, they lean in to hear what I am saying.  I think that people with hearing difficulties feel pretty isolated on a regular day so I don’t want to avoid them or walk away. But how do I keep us all safe and STILL be polite and understanding?
Six Fee of Distance

Dear Distance:
Ask them to turn up the volume.

New Rules

Posted on | May 9, 2020 | Comments Off on New Rules

Dear Short Answers:
Now that my husband and I are staying at home and not seeing any other people, he has decided that personal hygiene is irrelevant.  I have tried to convince him that good hygiene makes you happy but he doesn’t buy it. How do I convince him that his disgusting appearance makes me
UNHAPPY and that he should care about that?
I’m Serious

Dear Serious:
Well, we assume you have already tried asking him without insulting him, which would be our first choice. Second is to hope he’ll get over what ever he is trying to communicate, sooner rather than later.

Latitude and Longitude

Posted on | April 22, 2020 | Comments Off on Latitude and Longitude

Dear Short Answers:
Like many people these days I’ve taken the time to re-connect with long lost friends.  I’ve been so thrilled to rekindle some of these relationships. But now & then I come across an old friend who still harbors a grudge, about something that may or may not have happened decades ago. And
that’s the first thing they say, “did you call to apologize?????”  What can I
say to defuse the situation and just let bygones be bygones?  I’d love to
reduce everybody’s anger just a little bit.
Doing My Best

Dear Doing:
Your intentions are admirable but you have to meet people where they are, and it may not be where you want them to be.

He’s 19, Right?

Posted on | April 22, 2020 | Comments Off on He’s 19, Right?

Dear Short Answers:
My son, who is 19 years old, is convinced that he had the coronavirus and is now immune.  He was pretty sick last month but never got tested.  Now, he wants to use his free time to grocery shop for people, volunteer at the local food bank, and generally help out people who need it.  I am so proud of him for wanting to do this but petrified that he is wrong and that he is putting himself in danger if he does this.  How do I talk my child out of doing something so wonderful but dangerous?
Worried Mom

Dear Mom:
The obvious answer to your dilemma is for your son to get a test, no matter how invincible he believes himself to be. Anyone who is in contact with vulnerable populations needs to make certain that their good intentions do no harm. Sadly, this is easier said than done but perhaps your family physician can provide some guidance.

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