One Day at a Time

Dear Short Answers: My brother recently confided in me that he has a very serious and potentially fatal illness. Of course, I am devastated and I want to do whatever I can to help. He also doesn’t want anyone else in our family to know, especially our parents. They are both in their late 80s [...]


Dear Short Answers: My parents are getting older and need more and more attention. They refuse to move into an assisted living facility and seem to expect their children (there are 3 of us) to help out with things around the house, running errands and taking them to the doctor. Where does my responsibility as [...]

Watchful Waiting

Dear Short Answers: My baby sister is very upset about a lot of things. And she seems to want to alienate me as well. It seems like with things falling apart around her we should be closer but she seems intent on driving me away. What do you make of this? Ruth Dear Ruth: This [...]

Do It Well or Don’t Do It

Dear Short Answers: My sister is going on vacation and I am stuck with our elderly mom. I don’t want to be pissed off but I am so angry I can hardly be civil. Peggy Dear Peggy: Un-civil is unacceptable.  Find another option. 1 person likes this post. Unlike

It’s Her Story and She’s Sticking to It

Dear Short Answers: Everything my older sister says about herself is a lie. I can’t stand it anymore. What should I do? I Was There, Too Dear Too: Everyone is entitled to their own narrative.  And our experience is people get very committed to their version of truth. Leave it alone. Like Unlike

Your Brother’s Keeper

Dear Short Answers: My older brother has some emotional problems and tends to lean on me too much sometimes. I love him but want him to back off a bit and live his own life. What can I say to him that won’t hurt his feelings but gives me more space? A Smothered Little Sister [...]

Cents and Sensibility

Dear Short Answers: I have 2 children. One is reasonably well off, the other is chronically in debt. Do I treat them equally in my will? Mom Dear Mom: Which one were you considering rewarding — the grasshopper or the ant?  In general, we think an equal division is sensible and equitable regardless of circumstance.  [...]

Minding His Business

Dear Short Answers: I am really worried about my brother who has started to show up at family affairs with gorgeous much younger girls who I think are paid escorts (my brother’s 20 year marriage recently ended very badly). I am worried because (1) these girls are in it just for the money (I’m sure) [...]

Is 2 Too Many?

Dear Short Answers: This is going to sound really weird but I swear it’s true. A couple of weeks ago I met a really cute girl and we hung out a little and ended up having sex which was totally cool. Since then, we’ve seen each other a couple of times and we’re not going [...]

Day Late/Dollar Short

Dear Short Answers: My brother makes a LOT of money and is very generous. He helps support a number of family members including our parents who are in their middle 80′s. I’m far from poor but just finished putting a child through college. I haven’t contributed in the same way. He never asks for help, [...]

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