No Worries, Man

Posted on | July 29, 2013 | Comments Off

Dear Short Answers:
I am friends with the staff at a restaurant where I eat probably once a month. I don’t see any of them socially outside of the restaurant unless I happen to run into them. Last weekend, my husband and I were at the restaurant after they closed, and everyone was drinking. One of the servers told us he is getting married, and ended up giving us an invitation that night. I don’t know what to do. I haven’t seen him since, but I’m not even sure if he remembers inviting us. I would be embarrassed to RSVP to the bride’s parents, who are hosting the wedding, if she didn’t know we were invited. I am afraid to ask him about it, because I don’t want him to feel obligated to invite us. Really, I would have been very surprised to receive an invite under sober circumstances, but I like the guy, and would go if it were appropriate. I just have no idea what the polite thing is to do.
A Long Question for a Short Answer

Dear Long:
Send your server a note — at the restaurant if that is the only address you have and tell him you very much enjoyed the chat you had the other evening, that you wish him the best for his forthcoming nuptials but that you cannot attend.  If he indeed did inform the brides parents of his spontaneous invite — he will handle it.

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