Who Decides?

Posted on | June 7, 2015 | Comments Off

Dear Short Answers:
My friends and I are making a club but the president of the club is excluding my other two friends. What should I do?
Nervous

Dear Nervous:
Tell the “prez” that you would like to include your other two friends.  If you don’t feel comfortable with the “prez” making these decisions, tell him/her so, but be prepared to walk.

Deserve What???

Posted on | June 7, 2015 | Comments Off

Dear Short Answers:
Do you think it’s a good idea to take a year off between high school and college?  My mom says she won’t pay for college if I do but I feel that I deserve a year to relax and have fun before starting to work for the rest of my life.  What do you think?
Joey

Dear Joey:
Sometimes taking a year off is a very good idea — but your argument is very weak. Do better than that or she might decide not to pay for college EVER.

Return to Sender

Posted on | May 23, 2015 | Comments Off

Dear Short Answers:
A distant relative recently passed away and the man’s daughter (my second cousin) asked me if there was anything that I would like as a memento of my “uncle.”  I wrote her back that I would love one of his watches since he was an avid watch collector and had many wonderful pieces.  A few weeks later, I received a watch in the mail with a bill for $2,000!!!  I was flabbergasted!!  Should I just ignore the bill and see what happens or should I put the whole thing back in the mail to my cousin?
JEP

Dear JEP:
Pack it up and send it back with a lovely note saying that you “misunderstood” her question and explain that although you would have enjoyed a memento, the cost is too dear.

Department of “Oh Pleeze…”

Posted on | May 23, 2015 | Comments Off

Dear Short Answers:
I have an older brother who has lied about his age for decades.  Fortunately, he looks younger than he actually is so nobody is suspicious. Normally, his lies wouldn’t concern me but I recently went to visit him in the town where he now lives and he introduced me to all his new friends as his “older” brother.  I didn’t say word but I’ve been fuming about it ever since it happened.  If I go to visit him again, should I make sure everyone knows the truth, or  just say nothing?
John the Younger

Dear John:
Assuming you are over 12, WHY is this an issue for YOU?

Explorers

Posted on | May 17, 2015 | Comments Off

Dear Short Answers:
I found out that my son, who is only 14 years old, has been looking at gay porn on the Internet.  Is this normal behavior for a 14-year old?  Since he hasn’t said anything to me, should I mention this to him?  I would have to admit that I was looking at his computer and that might be a bigger problem for him than the porn.
Concerned

Dear Concerned:
All kids with Internet access will use it to explore all sorts of things.  It is kind of the point. Check in from time to time, and judge not. And no — don’t mention it unless you think he is being stalked or recruited.

Freedom of Choice

Posted on | May 17, 2015 | Comments Off

Dear Short Answers:
Do you think that marriage means anything anymore?  Most of my parents’ friends are divorced and most of my own friends aren’t interested in getting married.  Is “just living together” the wave of the future?
A Millenial

Dear M:
The divorce rate peaked in the late 1970′s and early 80′s. It is actually lower now, in part because fewer people get married. Marriage continues to mean a great deal to many, and we advocate that choice for couples who are willing and able to make a long-term commitment. Living together is not a new phenomenon.  We think it is an acceptable first step or even a landing point.

Funny Money

Posted on | May 17, 2015 | Comments Off

Dear Short Answers:
I am almost at the age when I can start collecting social security.  I don’t really need the money since I have saved a good amount and get a pension from my job.   But I do feel that since I paid into the system, I should get something out.  Is that wrong?
Rich Enough

Dear Rich:
It’s not wrong — it is your money. Our advice is to take it and do good things for yourself or for others as you wish.

Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff

Posted on | May 17, 2015 | Comments Off

Dear Short Answers:
Now that my kids are grown and out of the house, I have the luxury of having THREE guest rooms.  Since I live fairly close to the ocean, I have a lot of friends who love to stay with me for a few days in the summer.  My problem is how to “assign” the guest rooms if more than one person is staying with me at the same time.  Only one has it’s own bathroom and another one is really small.  ”First come first served” works great but if they arrive at the same time, what do I do?  Age before beauty?  Or do I let them fight it out between themselves?
Hostess with an Issue

Dear Hostess:
Try asking your guests when you invite them which room they prefer.  Or just assign them.  It doesn’t matter. THEY are GUESTS.

Love Him or Leave Him

Posted on | May 11, 2015 | Comments Off

Dear Short Answers:
My husband (72) seems to be chronically depressed or have a mood disorder.  In the last 12 years, 4 different doctors have prescribed antidepressants which he refuses to take.  He sleeps most of the day, bathes about every 2 weeks, has no friends and his adult children from out-of-state have never visited during the 14 years we have been married.  My doctor tells me that my husband has made his decision and may enjoy this way of escape.  What can I do?  I feel that life is being sucked out of me.  I am 67.
Not Ready for This

Dear Not Ready:
You need to seek counseling for yourself. If he refuses help, you have some hard choices to make.

Who Died and Left you King?

Posted on | May 3, 2015 | Comments Off

Dear Short Answers:
If you have a friend who really, really, really wants to be a singer but can’t sing a note, what’s the best thing for you to do?  Let her try and get humiliated?  Or tell her the truth and spare her the pain and embarrassment?
Ears Hurt

Dear Ears:
And just why are you the arbiter on this one?You probably would have told Leonard Cohen to hang it up.

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