Unanticipated Consequences

Posted on | October 22, 2016 | Comments Off

Dear Short Answers:
My husband has been having some anxiety issues so I finally convinced him to see a therapist.  After one visit, he came home to tell me that he is moving out of the house “at the recommendation of his therapist.”  Needless to say, I was shocked and I can’t believe that any real therapist would say such a thing.  I called his therapist but he refuses to talk to me about his “patient.”  Meanwhile, my husband is making plans to move out.  What do I do now?  I feel like I started something that is way out of my control now.
Gobsmacked

Dear Gobsmacked:
We are too (gobsmacked)! Have you asked your husband if you and he can attend a therapy session together? This seems like the least one owes a partner with whom you have taken the “’til death do us part” oath.

Got Jacket, Lost Friend

Posted on | October 22, 2016 | Comments Off

Dear Short Answers:
I was at a friend’s house for dinner a week ago and accidentally left my jacket there. I called to say that I would come and get it and he said “sure.”  When I got there, no one was home so I waited around for a bit.  I finally just decided to go inside (the door was unlocked) and retrieve my coat.  When my friend returned home, he called and starting screaming at me that I had no right to walk into his house uninvited and that he should call the police to report a robbery.  I thought he was joking, so I explained that this was a “burglary” not a “robbery.”  He screamed an expletive then hung up.  Should I try to patch this up?  Maybe send him flowers?  Or just ignore it and hope that he comes to his senses?
Norman

Dear Norman:
This guy is out of control. If he doesn’t come to his senses and apologize, we would take him off our list.

It Better Be a Good One

Posted on | October 22, 2016 | Comments Off

Dear Short Answers:
I called my sister-in law today and she said she would not be able to speak to me for a week because she was “so busy.”  It sounds to me like she doesn’t want to talk at all, right?
Annie

Dear Annie:
In a world in which one is expected to return a text within minutes and an email within hours, it does seem like your sister-in-law has  some time management issues. Or some other issue. Wait a week and see what kind of whopper she comes up with.

When 1 Plus 1 Still Equals 1

Posted on | October 22, 2016 | Comments Off

Dear Short Answers:
I have a friend with whom I’ve always had a lopsided relationship — meaning it is always about him. His problems have been the “main course” in our relationship for decades.  When I try to discuss it, I believe he really doesn’t know what I’m talking about. How can I make this a more balanced friendship?
Shorted

Dear Shorted:
We think that change is unlikely. Since it has apparently been okay with you for “decades,” perhaps you might consider why it is bothering you now and share that with Mr. Me.

Stupid Is as Stupid Does

Posted on | October 6, 2016 | Comments Off

Dear Short Answers:
How stupid can this site get?
Not So Stupid

Dear Not:
We can get PRRRRETTY STUPID!!!

Funny You Should Ask

Posted on | October 6, 2016 | Comments Off

Dear Short Answers:
How does England elect their political leaders?
Looking for Something Better

Dear Better:
English voters elect a political party (or in rare cases there is a coalition that joins together if there is no clear majority).  The party then elects the Prime Minister who is generally the head of the party. The opposition also elects a “shadow cabinet” which stands at the ready. Makes sense.

Getting to Know Her

Posted on | October 6, 2016 | Comments Off

Dear Short Answers:
I have met this woman who happens to be a parent of a 4-year old.  I’m sure it will be a while before I meet her child if things progress.  So how do I address scheduling dates until then.  She doesn’t have family nearby to babysit, and her ex is unwilling to take in his own child on nights she wants to go out.  I feel like we have chemistry and don’t want to give this one up just because…
Interested

Dear Interested:
Ask her to pick a night that works for her.  Babysitters are generally available.  If she is not comfortable leaving a 4-year old with a sitter, you know where you are (and likely will be) in the pecking order.

Few Words Owed

Posted on | October 1, 2016 | Comments Off

Dear Short Answers:
I live in a small town. Someone I know broke up with her guy a few months ago. I ran into her in a bar and she shared how happy she was that it was over. She has a history of having a short temper and although she started calmly to talk to me about her break up, it quickly degenerated and I had to excuse myself as I don’t do well with anger. A few weeks later her beau ended up at a party I had at my house. Weeks went by and he asked me for a date. I am developing a liking for him and the  word has gotten out to her and I know she is angry. I think I owe her a few words but I am not sure what they are.  I want to respect her pain and most likely her jealousy but how do I do this with tact?
Georgia

Dear Georgia:
Sounds like their relationship is virtually ancient history.  No need for apology or explanation. If she confronts you, just say “I thought you were done with him?”  Is that few enough for you, bunky?

Decor or Decorum?

Posted on | October 1, 2016 | Comments Off

Dear Short Answers:
What do you do in the living room?
New Wife

Dear Wife:
Anything you wish that is not flushable or combustible.

Truth Sayer

Posted on | October 1, 2016 | Comments Off

Dear Short Answers:
I am a pretty good cook and I frequently have dinner parties at my home.  The problem is that my husband always feels compelled to give out my “culinary” secrets.  For example, if someone compliments the dessert, he’ll say “Oh, Helen just bought a pound cake and dressed it up!”  Or if they like the salad, he’ll say “Really?  Most of that is leftover vegetables from last night’s dinner!”  I glare at him and sit in stony silence.  But how do I make him stop without causing a big scene??
So Annoyed

Dear Annoyed:
Tell him one more time that your recipes are your business and that you consider them “family secrets.”  If he continues to overshare, do not hesitate to out him immediately.  You can start with, “Really? That was rude!’ and escalate if necessary. Like with puppies, an immediate reaction may be essential.

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